Release history:
v0.1: The POC version with just the washing sprite.
---- THE ORIGINAL AMIGA VERSION README
The PenguinSoft Window Washer
20th July 1991
by Simon Butcher, With Special Thanks to Tim Gladding for the samples.
I'm dedicating this one to Special Agent Dale Cooper.
Acknowledgments
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
David Butcher - for making caustic comments throughout developments.
Matt Dillon - for DICE, on which this was written.
Tim Gladding - for promising to do an Acorn Archimedes version, and
for providing the sponge.
Debbie Scanlan - for her extraneous advice.
Introduction
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Have you ever wondered what happens on the inside of your
monitor or television screen? You can clean your disk drives, the
computer, the outside of your screen, but NOT the inside. Did the
designers of this wonderful technology miss something?
In the early days of televisions scientist thought not. Your
actual screen is a vacuum container, into which no dirt or dust could
get. (see fig 1.1) The only things inside the screen are the electrons
(if they count as things). This is where the problem lies.
Fig 1.1 - The Normal Cathode Tube
stream of electrons
/
____ /
__/ X
electron __/ / |
gun \___/ / |
|===|......./...|
|___| |
\__ . |---- phosphorous screen
\__/ |
/\____/
/
/
suicidal electron
Recently much research at the DuckSoft Institute for Science
and Technology, has gone into the behaviour of these electrons.
Many shocking revelations have come to light. In the words of
Prof. Cyd Butcher, (No blood relative) head of televisual laboratory
research at the DuckSoft Institute, in his highly regarded paper "The
Psychology of Electrons."
"It has been discovered that because the electrons shooting
out of the electron gun, is such a traumatic experience that the
effect can be quite dramatically disturb the electrons
psychologically. They become obsessed with the idea of individuality,
earthquakes and the ego state. They become unstable, and a small few
suicidal. These unfortunate sub-atomic particles deliberately try to
break out of the electron beam in an attempt to create a personal
sense of freedom. Consequently they go careering off at the wrong
angle, breaking under the magnetic stresses into smaller particles
quantum physicists are either yet to discover or haven't got around to
naming yet. The name for these remains is 'post-paranoic meson/muon
residue'."
Fig 1.2 - A tube with Residue.
stream of electrons
/
____ /
__/ X
electron __/ /|+---- layer of residue
gun \___/ / ||
|===|......./..||
|___| ||---- phosphorous screen
\__ . ||
\__/ ||
/\____/
/
/
suicidal electron
This is the point at which Window Washer picks up the story.
The purpose of Window Washer is to clean up and dispose of the post-
paranoic meson/muon residue. Providing a nice clean surface for the
new electrons straight from the gun, to hit. This will give a much
improved picture. (probably)
Unfortunately, all of this is hard to prove as the dirt
involved is invisible to the naked eye, and only a few angstroms
thick, and the whole program does seem a bit pointless if you're using
a LCD or alternative technology screen.
WashWare
~~~~~~~~
This program is WashWare, (yes yet another ShareWare
derivative).
WashWare is my alternative to ShareWare. Every time my
program revolves several more inches of residue just think where you'd
be without it. (Nowhere)
Now I'm not greedy, I'm not asking much. Here's my system.
If you wash your windows a lot (as any responsible user does) and and
you feel I deserve some sort of reward, you can do something for me in
exchange. So here's a list of possibilities.
Favour
Buy a copy of the DuckSoft Debugger. (soon to be released.)
Say very loudly "PenguinSoft are Great."
Write me a fan letter.
Give me a fan letter.
Give me a job.
Buy any Blondie Album.
Send me any software (except viruses) you've written.
Write a letter of complaint DEMANDING the immediate filming of
a third series of Twin Peaks.
Send me a Cherry Pie.
Get a copy of 2000AD.
Buy Maus by Art Spielgelman.
Watch the Magic Roundabout.
Write Dougal a fan letter.
Write Dylan the rabbit a fan letter.
Send me some Public Domain.
Get me a job in the FBI. But no I'll settle for one of those
FBI jackets Special Agent Cooper wears.
(Glasgow residents) Give me somewhere to live. (I wanna
emigrate.)
Say very loudly "PenguinSoft are Great." to your bank manager.
Say very loudly "PenguinSoft are Great." to my bank manager.
Alternatively, if you feel so inclined send an amount of your local
currency, say around $5 equivalent or whatever you think suitable.
Distribution
~~~~~~~~~~~~
For the moment this program is distributable. Go on give it
away.
Warranty
~~~~~~~~
DuckSoft, PenguinSoft, or anyone involved in creation of this
program, or mentioned in this whole distribution, make no warranties,
either expressed or implied to the suitability, quality, performance
or fitness for any particular purpose. The entire risk as to this
distributions quality and performance is with the user. Should any
information provided prove defective, the user (and not the authors,
or PenguinSoft) assumes the entire cost of all necessary damages, In
no event will PenguinSoft or the authors be liable for, direct,
indirect or consequential damages resulting from any defect in the
information or use of the program even if they have been advised of
the possibility of such damages.
Running the program indicates automatic assumption of these
terms.
Contacts
~~~~~~~~
You can contact me at:
Rijon,
Padnal,
Littleport,
Ely,
Cambs.
A cheaper but indirect alternative - via my Brothers E-mail Address-
D.J.Butcher@ncl.ac.uk
