[glen-bugs] led through all the c

[Elefritz <mac...@in...>]

Ly. 'Could I enjoy the pleasures of self-approbation, it would be
impossible to be very wretched, but the most exact performance of my
duty will not yield me that gratification, since I cannot be perfectly
satisfied that I do right in marrying a man so very disagreeable to me.
I fear the pride of reputation influences me more than I imagine, and
though it is as justifiable as any pride, yet still it is certainly no
virtue.' 'When I reflect,' said she afterwards, 'on the step I am going
to take, my terrors are inexpressible; how dreadful is it at my age,
when nature seems to promise me so many years of life, to doom myself to
a state of wretchedness which death alone can terminate, and wherein I
must bury all my sorrows in silence, without even the melancholy relief
of pouring them forth in the bosom of my friend, and seeking, from her
tender participation, the only consolation I could receive! For after
this dreaded union is completed, duty will forbid me to make my
distresses known, even to my Louisa; I must not then expose the faults
of him whose slightest failings I ought to conceal. One only hope
remains, that you, my first and dearest friend, will not abandon me;
that whatever cloud of melancholy may hang over my mind, yet you will
still bear with me, and remove your abode to a place where I may have
the consolation of your company. If it be in m