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I did emerge tightvnc and everything went through, all the files downloaded. but now I'm supoosed to have a /root/.vnc/ but it's not there, so I can't start my vnc server, did I miss any steps?
Thats generally a VNC issue more than a colinux issue. The .vnc stuff is your settings for it. Have you had a look around on http://forums.gentoo.org? I suspect others who have emerged tightvnc may have the same issues, and may directly answer your question for you. To be very frank, if I was to answer directly, I would have gone and looked it up there, and on the tightvnc web pages, but I dont know your setup as well as you, and its better to empower you with the places I would have looked.
If you find there are steps missing from the colinux wiki describing how to get tightvnc running, feel free to add stuff to it.